Did it cut to deep for a reply-all? Â No no no. Â You just sound bitter about the Phillies.
It shook me for a second, though. Â Not because it was inappropriate, but it made me think deeper for a few moments, which is always welcome.
Like.. I get that being a consumer, paying for anti-consumerist slogans, on plastic stickers, is vile and silly. Â I also get a link to a blog could be narcissistic, if it had anything to do with my beliefs or was about me, but as I said.. I am a funnel. It’s just aggregate info on environmental things. Â None of it is my own ideas or writing really.
There’s a part of me extraordinarily vain and self absorbed that thinks I am the bomb and will conquer men, etc. Â But most of me, in utter humility in the face of obvious annihilation (be it cataclysmic wiping of the human race from existence, or slowly, painfully dying alone and grumpy as I fall victim to mortality), knows I really could never be relevant… ever. Â Maybe in the hotel industry down the line, or maybe some random brain fart of an invention…. but we all get sidelined into the annals of obscurity.
http://www.edternet.com/unclefishbits/2010/02/08/time-is-the-best-censor/
Is linking that narcissistic? Â Maybe I am just thinking too much.
But Time *is* the best censor – and if we have already forgotten presidents from a couple scores of years ago, and have zero awareness for the frontiersmen that forged this country, or endless authors of endless meaningless books, or people that have shaped this land in legitimate, tangible ways that simply have a plaque at a library…. so…. who the fuck am I? Â How could I possibly matter in a grand scheme of things?
I don’t. Â I know it.
It doesn’t even hurt anymore (I was meant to be a intrepid spaceman nobel prize winning scientist poet US President). Â It’s just reality. Â Every living thing dies alone? It’s a cold truth, and whether you are important or not you still get digested by worms and blown back into space in atomic particles. Â I guess this dour realism would negate the idea of spreading altered consciousness? Â Maybe altered consciousness is all we have.
We are priming our next generation into wanton need of recognition and notoriety, with coddling parents saying “you can be anything”, while learning that sex tapes are the quickest path to stardom. Â “The world needs ditch diggers too.” Â They will pine for fame and their own wiki page – something they will seek in infamy or madness now that it will be too hard to get their own cooking show or obtain over a million hits on their youtube upload. I worry about that part of it.
It’s only going to get worse.
But hell, I ordered stickers. Â I am making a difference. Â Ha….
Trust me I am not delusional. Altered maybe.
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